For the week ending 4 September 2010 / 24 Elul 5770

Wedding Woes

by Rabbi Mendel Weinbach zt'l
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Question: I am sometimes invited to the wedding of a friend whose standard of kashrut observance is not quite up to my own and whose idea of mixed seating at the meal makes it very difficult for me to participate in the dinner. Mentioning my reservations can seriously damage our relations. What is the right thing to do?

Answer: You certainly have no obligation to compromise your standards of religious observance but you must be extremely careful in how you handle this matter. The best way is to inform your friend that you have a conflict obligation that evening but that you will share his simcha by attending the chupah or coming towards the end of the evening to dance with him and the others.

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